It would be insufficient to say I just woke up one morning and decided, “I want to die today.” It could never be that simple. Four years have gone by and I still don’t know how to talk about it. I am afraid you won’t be able to understand, but I have decided that’s okay because honestly, I’m not sure I understand either. And whatever I think I have figured out, still the lingering question inside my head remains, why does God save some and not others? Much more to my confusion, why me?
